Should It Stay Or Should It Go?

So, I've been contemplating for a while now whether I should close my other "regular" blog and just continue on with this one, Joshua's.

Aside from my increasingly busy work schedule and general inability to find more time in the day, the pressure of keeping up with two blogs as well as my regular print columns is proving a little too much to handle. It's probably what's causing my worsening problems with stringing words and sentences.

Those who have been reading from the very beginning, aside from being deserving of a gold star, would know that this whole second "secret" postings all started because I needed a place to write without the need for censorship. Mainly, I needed a medium where I can bitch and moan about certain individuals without them being privy to my rantings.

This was all meant to be temporary. A passing phase. But instead, I found that it really fit - and I likes it. Joshua is me, and that other one, the self-titled one, well, it used to be me. Somehow, over the course, that blog became a little too manufactured; less a reflection of who I really am and more of what my online persona had become. And besides, my friend Jug said that he's gotten boring. Joshua is where the interest is at.

Which bring me to today's dilemma: I've kept both blogs out of obligation to my readers and because of their history but one really must be closed. And the delete button is pointed at the other. I just can't bring myself to press it.

So, what do you think I should do: should it stay or should it go?

(I realise I'm totally making mountains out of molehills here, but right now, this is my Everest. Help me scale it.)

There's Always One...

Okay, so I know everyone, including myself, is still recovering from the Catholic lovefest that was World Youth Day (which is in itself a stupid title for something that dragged on for a whole WEEK) and are officially on Pope-overload but I couldn't resist sharing this photo.





Feel the force, you religious bitches.

Off To The Movies

The Melbourne International Film Festival (MIFF) starts this Friday and for a movie nut like myself, it's going to be the start of an exciting few weeks.

I love a good cinema lovefest and although I've missed much of the past few years' showing, I try and make the most of what I actually go and see. It usually becomes a night out with coffees, drinks or meals. Sometimes before AND after the show. This year is no different and what's more, it looks like I'm going to be catching up with a few peeps, especially with long-time online bud, Evol.

So, after pouring over the guide, buying the mini-pass and booking the sessions, I'm now set for this year's festival.

Check out below the list of films I'm watching - all TWELVE of them.

DAY OF THE DEAD
Gore becomes almost conceptual art in this third (and unduly underestimated) chapter of the 'Dead' series. Written as a colossal finale to the series, but downsized at the last minute due to budget cuts, it's quintessential Romero at his most minimal, effective and ferociously visionary.

FUNNY GAMES
After arriving at their lakeside summerhouse, a middle-class family of three are besieged by two young men. The merciless pair challenges the family to a series of 'games', and make them a chilling bet: that they will not survive the next 12 hours.

DEAD ON: THE LIFE AND CINEMA OF GEORGE A. ROMERO
Director Rusty Nails explores Romero's work, life and methods in this documentary, drawing on interviews with filmmakers and artists including Dennis Hopper, Stephen King, John Carpenter, Dario Argento, Wim Wenders, Danny Boyle, John Waters, Quentin Tarantino, Robert Rodriguez and many others.

THE CRAZIES
A plane crash in Evans City leads to a poisonous spill in the local water supply. To contain the plague and keep things under wraps Washington sends in a sinister, brutal force in white decontamination suits and black masks. Caught between two horrors, the infected town fights back.

SHALL WE KISS?
When Gabriel and Emilie meet, both know that feelings are building up between them; the politeness of their encounter is overshadowed by the kiss that seems to be waiting at the end of the evening. But both have partners and, as Emilie explains, no kiss is innocent. Box-office smash French film.

SLINGSHOT
A fast-paced swoop into the streets of Manila, Slingshot follows the lives of a group of tiradors -or 'slingshots' - local slang for petty thieves who operate the streets, stealing, fighting and avoiding the police. Multiple award winner, including the Caligari Film Award at the 2008 Berlin International Film Festival.

DONKEY PUNCH
Making his feature filmmaking debut, Olly Blackburn gathers a cast of beautiful people for an orgiastic ocean voyage that goes horribly wrong. When some sexy young holidaymakers get together for a cruise on a luxury yacht off the coast of Spain, the scene is set for a drug, booze and sex filled romp. But things take a darker turn, one that soon sees the boat's inhabitants turn viciously on one another.

THE AMAZING TRUTH ABOUT QUEEN RAQUELA
Raquela Rios has a dream: to make it all the way to Paris, to meet her Prince Charming and to settle down into a life of luxury. But Paris is a long way from the streets of Cebu City in the Philippines and Raquela is a transsexual prostitute - the odds, it seems, are stacked against her. Winner of the Teddy Award for Best Feature at the 2008 Berlin Film Festival.

STRANGERS
Israeli Eyal and Palestinian Rana are two strangers who, in normal circumstances, would never meet. But a chance event sees their lives intertwine when, in Berlin for the World Cup finals, they accidentally swap bags on the subway. This twist of fate leads them to spend three days together amongst the roaring soccer crowds, falling for each other even as the second Israel-Lebanon war erupts in the distant Middle-East.

BOY A
After his released from jail into a bewildering adult world, 24-year-old Jack is given a new name, a new job, a new home and a new life. But when his heroic actions thrust him into the media spotlight his anonymity begins to crumble, and Jack is forced to contend with his past - and the monstrous crime he committed. Winner of the Jury Prize at this year's Berlin International Film Festival, and a multiple nominee at the BAFTA Awards.

DIARY OF THE DEAD
Taking a shot at Zack Snider's accelerated version of the living dead, Romero returns for the fifth time to his own franchise with a trip back to the future. A film full of energy, as close as ever to Night of the Living Dead yet rooted in our own new media culture. Shooting for the first time in HD, Romero constructs Diary through the lenses (two videocameras and one cell phone) of a group of students caught in the zombie invasion - while shooting a Mummy movie.

OTTO; OR, UP WITH DEAD PEOPLE
Filmmaking provocateur Bruce LaBruce's (The Raspberry Reich) latest film features a hoodie-wearing zombie, Otto, who reticently rises from the grave and wanders the gay clubs of Berlin. In his journey of self-discovery he stumbles across an underground filmmaker, participates in a documentary about himself and attempts to reconnect with a former boyfriend, with disastrous results.


So, what are you watching this year?

Like A Wave of Japanese Locals

I'm battling a really terrible case of blogger's block so bad that I feel like a solitary figure trying to make my way through a huge wave of hyped up Japanese locals on the run like they've had a bad serving of raw sashimi.

I just can't string a decent sentence nor simile together.

So, in the meantime, have a peek at this video and get yourself entertained by... well, you'll see. Enjoy.

Blonde Busty Buxom To The Rescue

I just sat through the last hour of Big Brother and watched as Pamela Anderson, she of the busty buxom, made her much-announced entrance into the house. I feel like a million of my brain cells have just suicided.

There's obviously something about this show that I don't get but every other moronic idiots who were loudly screaming in the studio audience that do. (Apologies to those who were doing the same in the comforts of their lounge room.) But seriously, what is it? Is it voyeurism? The contemporarised and popularised study of human nature? Or just plain entertainment? I can understand how the first two may play a large part in the appeal of such shows but entertaining is definitely something I don't agree with. I found the whole thing utterly boring.

Earlier in the day, I saw a televised media conference of Ms Anderson being interviewed by the journos and press. When asked how much she was getting paid to be a part of the series, the blonde one played coy but implied that it could be in the six-figure sum. Seriously?! That's a lot of money for someone who doesn't really have any thing to do with the program apart from the shameless ratings grab that would ensue from her appearance. Still, I know plenty of "celebrities" who would do the same for far less.

Surely there's a point where the cost to one's self-identity far outweighs that of the price being paid for such things. Prostitution is a term that seems almost applicable here.

Anyway, I've intellectualised far too much something that doesn't really deserve to be. After all, we're talking forgettably mediocre trash TV fodder that's hosted by the fat and ugly Kyle Sandilands. It's a wonder the bloody thing rates at all..............

And now, I guess, I understand why the producers brought in Pamela.

Appetite

Here I am apologising again for neglecting my blogging duties in spite of only about two or three of you guys out there actually reading. Still, I like to take care of my peeps.

The reason for the lack of updates? I've had the biggest CBF week in my life. Ever.

So much that I've lost appetite for everything, including that thing that men are meant to have on their minds every seven seconds or so... and gay men, oh, every three. Nate messaged me about half-a-dozen times during the week wanting to hook up, once even inviting me to go for a dip in his spa. But even the prospect of some wet (water sports) fun couldn't budge my stupor.

Work has been pretty boring, too, and socially, well, not much of that happening either. Despite the numerous invites for drinks and outings, I've been sequestered at home, watching endless episodes of the Golden Girls, thanks to a complete series of DVDs ordered via Amazon. Yes, I'm moving ever closer to being a spinster forever.

But where my appetite has abated is some areas, it has come back with a vengeance in others... especially where it truly applies. Food!

Pizza, lasagna, chocolates and biscuits. A bag of potato chips at every sitting. A whole apple pie with a tub of ice cream. Sometimes with custard sauce, sometimes with maple syrup. I'm seriously close to forfeiting my Sexy Bitch card and swapping it for a name badge at an Overeaters Anonymous. Can you imagine?

"Hello, my name is Joshua. And I'm a potato crisp and apple pie addict."

There really aren't any good reasons why I should be binging or feeling this way. I'm not depressed, not unemployed, not socially-disabled, nor am I lacking sex. I don't know why I feel this desire to stuff my face constantly and to be honest, nor do I care. I guess I should, but, well, at the moment, I really Can't Be Farked!

In the meantime, though, I have more episodes of the Girls to go and I think I spotted one last bag of crisps sitting in the pantry.

Behold! My self-portrait as I type out this post.
My tan is just horrible this time of the year.